Another Special Angel
I’ve been fairly quiet over the last few months. Not a day has passed that I’m not grateful for the momentum and growth around Blake’s story and legacy. It’s just that amid the development and launch of the website, the anniversary of Blake’s passing and media interviews, another story was unfolding. My mom, Blake’s Nana, was diagnosed with cancer leading into the holidays. The possibility of losing her too, robbed me of my words. I have been honest in my truth on this horrific ride over the last few years, and while I’ve attempted to remain grounded – an additional layer of stress and sadness shrouded my perspective.
My mom passed away on February 25th. With that loss we gained another special angel. However, the weight of a second significant loss feels exponentially heavier. She’s Mom. Nana. Grammy. She too is irreplaceable. I’m not an angry person, but I have found myself to be mad that the universe would take my mom just one year after taking my son. The pieces of my heart are now in more pieces. That struggle is real. I maintain shreds of sanity by telling myself that my life is just being rearranged. I don’t know what it will look like. It certainly isn’t anything like I ever hoped or imagined, but I have faith that this is just an unfair and insanely sad chapter in an unfinished and unwritten book.
Blake had a very special connection with my mom, and no question his existence radiated light in her life. The heartache of Blake’s death rocked our whole family, and will affect us forever – but I don’t think my Mom’s spirit even began to recover. In her last few days, my only positive sentiment around losing her was that she would be reunited with him. I can envision the joy on my mom’s face, and the comfort Blake has in her arms now that they are together again. I think about that constantly… my heart cries and smiles at the same time.
I am blessed to have had my mom. Not just any mom. My mom. And I remain forever grateful for the time we had with Blake. Together they have taught me infinite lessons and filled my heart beyond measure. I hope to find peace with their eternal love and continue to channel it positively for the world to experience.
#foreverinourhearts #forevergrateful #ForBlake #gonebutneverforgotten #iloveyousmoochie #loveyoumom
